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Driving
Romania is a world with absolutely no speed limits. It's a country full of Michael Schumachers and Valentino Rossis. Only the best survive. Romanian drivers are not superstitious, they don't believe in signs (road-signs) so you better not be a pedestrian (they're not superstitious either, but i never heard of a pedestrian smashing into a vehicle, only the opposite). If you try to switch the lane don't EVER give a signal, you will only let the others know what you want to do so they can block you. Just switch the lane and give the signal after (so the Garcea officer can see you tried at least). Romanian drivers have the unusual habit on slowing down when they see a white vehicle parked on the roadside (even more if it's written "ECILOP"/"AITILOP" on it). If you see a driver with his neck on the steering wheel... well... it's not HIS neck, it's HER neck. Watch it... women don't switch lanes, they just drive on both of them at the same time... to be sure they don't hit something on the roadside (which they do anyway, cuz they will have to park the car eventualy). If you see a car parked by an angle of more than 30` to the sidewalk, you can be sure SHE did it. Don't try to tell someone (driver or pedestrian) he's wrong. You'll get to hear a lot of words referring to reproductive organs and close relatives or even get a physical correction.! Another of the romanian driving habbits is to listen to a loud and distorded form of music called manele. It is said to enrich the driver with ultra-high reflexes and a loose mouth(slobod la gura). Another form of enlightement is talking on the cell phone while driving. This helps the driver concentrate on the road. The cell phone is usualy accompanied by a cigarette bought from the bisnitari (a form of high developed merchants), though nobody knows how the steering of the car actualy takes place in this condition. Romania is also the only country in the world where you can see a horse or donkey-driven carriage next to a Porsche Cayenne. If you think that carriages are ugly, you don't have to worry about seeing them at night, because they have absolutely no lights whatsoever. Some models have sophisticated cabins made of an old car, fitted with a steering wheel, cassette player and even an alarm. (But no lights!) Also here in Romania is very TARANESC - "Tzaranesc - Something really cool, but pretty basic, in order to be understandable by the peasants." to put neon lights under your car, even if by that you double the value of the car. Also you can meet various forms of home made aillerons - that should improve handling performances of the car (even if the car would reach 70 km/h only down the hill), and they are usualy combined with that strange form of music combined with very much noise and special distortion from car speakers - very low price combined with "good quality" - MANELE. Also if you don't wear a big gold-like bracelets on both hands, and very big rings - "GHIULURI - also something TARANESC (GHIULURI are hand made by nomad gipsyes from at least half a kilo of gold, in unique models that look very sheety)", you have more chances that a guy with a strange looking uniform who drives the car marked with ECILOP/AITILOP on the hood will stop you and ask you for SHPAGA. And you should know that GHIULURI is a must with at least two golden teeth - fitted in a very very visible place in your mouth so everybody can see how rich you are.
Driving In Bucharest
easy steps :
- if the street is full, drive on sidewalk
- if the sidewalk is full,go on the local river(Dambovitza),it has 3 speed lines
- if u`re lost,ask a local make [romanian : machedon aka tzantzar (mosquito)] to show u the way.hint : always take the opposite dirrection.
- if you get are stopped by street police due to traffic misconduct, tell them your uncle is a senator or bribe them (from 20 RON to 150 RON, depends on what rule u broke)
- if you are waiting for some pedestrians to cross the street at the street crossing, it is polite to start a conversation (as you'll have plenty of time) - for example:
if one of the pedestrians is a man and he has burried his hands inside his jeans pockets, you could say something like "Bai, scoate mainile din buzunar ca-ti mananca *cenzurat* unghiile." which means "Yes sir, you can never be too careful around this neighborhood - a lot of thieves are after your "*cenzurat*" (money)."
if one of the pedestrians is a woman, you can start a conversation by saying something like "Fa, misca-te mai repede ca masina asta calca nu fute!" which means "Hi! I'll be glad to give you a lift!".
- the only rules of driving in Bucharest are the above rules. However, if you're not careful while driving in Bucuresti, you might get a mooje *cenzurat*.
- and last but certainly not least, you can't be a propper romanian driver if you can't swear propperly. and you definitely can't be a bucharest driver without being able to swear for 30 minutes without repeating yourself.